Mar 31, 2012

a spark.

It always happens this way.

I don't know why I am so doubtful and faithless. I should see it coming every time.

Every time I think the world is evil, that I am surrounded by darkness and wallowing pitifully in a sea of emptiness...a tiny spark shows up.

This time in the form of people's care for the orphaned.

Last week during our Saturday afternoon lunch ritual, Dr. Xu informed me that he would be picking me up at 8am next Saturday so our lunch was off. "Where are we going?" I asked, used to this kind of non-invitation invitation. "We're going to help the babies," he replied. All the response I needed.

Michael is an incredible force of a person (I seem to be surrounded by amazing people). After introducing him to L from the rehabilitation center last Chrstmas, the orphan program has exploded under Chin.ese care - a foreign aid person's dream. I know that I could walk out of this country tomorrow and the orphan program would last beyond me - it does not need me. This is humbling and awesome. I've learned in the past few years that I am not really the person called to DO incredible things, I'm the person called to LINK incredible people. And then cheer them on and go for the ride. Great by me.

Michael picked me up and we drove around town collecting people before congregating at the center. As we were picking up one doctor, Michael said, "He is an ENT doctor. Ears, Nose, Tears." "Um, Michael, isn't it ears, nose, throat?" hahahaha. We didn't let him live that down. SO funny.

We eventually met our group of 15 - 5 doctors, some pharmacists, some family members, and random me. As it was most of the group's first time at the center, they had a formal meeting at the round table. After being made to introduce myself in Ch.inese, I ducked out of the room to hang out with L in the hallway. I'm not really into this formal stuff after 4 years of going there.


While the doctors did their doctor thing, I did my Jessica thing which is - collect children. (Everytime I go there I wish I was more useful and contemplate nursing school. Then I remember that I can't even get my blood pressure taken without freaking out and I dismiss the thought. ha.) Hugs it is.


I love my people. And those baby eyelashes. This little dude in the top left is a dwarf - no other ailment. He really tugged at my heartstrings. Everytime he would go down the slide, he would bang his head because his body preportions are off. He's head-heavy. So he finally retreated to his corner in a fit of tears. Precious baby.

The mundane reasons these kids are abandoned are so sad sometimes. (well, all the time). This is just the way it is in a country with a one-child policy and no social security system. The one kid is required to care for his/her elderly parents. If you get a non-perfect kid...it's gotta go.



Can you find the little downs syndrome boy in the balls in the top left? I was just wandering about and asked the ayi's (worker women) how I could help. They giggled and dragged me outside for a photo session on the roof like they had been scheming it all along and were just waiting for me to approach them. Presh.



Then it was lunch time -for the babies and the big people. The center fed us bamboo shoots, sliced pumpkin (my fave!) and preserved vegetable. Our lunch time convo centered on the english translation for "preserved vegetable" (I had no idea) and me giving people's kids English names. Towards the end of lunch people started handing me their un-eaten bowls because since I am, "so big," I should, "eat more." Bah.


Then I got a lesson in durability. If this little leg-less boy can but his own chair away by hobbling on his knees like it ain't no thang- I can suck it up on many occasions. Humbling. What a little rock-star.

Group photo with the lovies.


And my ultimate lovies, Michael and L. Two of my fave people in the universe and two of my heroes. Two inspiring, relentless, giving people in the face of adversity that I will never fully comprehend. The fact that my favorites are now partners in good is AWESOME. It's like an orphan care power team.

While this photo was being taken I yelled out, "L sandwhich!" No one understood me. Haha.


While compiling the pictures back at home, an old camp song crept into my head. I realized that this was a spark. That there is good in the world, people who are working against odds greater than any I will ever know, and I need to buck it up, scrape myself off the valley floor, and truck on.

We all enter the valley sometimes - hard times, sadness, uncertainty, fear...it's part of the human experience. But we can't stay there forever. There's orphans to care for, people to feed, languages to learn, bridges to build, work to do. Today was just what I needed. I should have known it was coming.

It only takes a spark to get a fire going
and soon all those around can warm up in its glowing
That's how it is with Gawd's love
Once you've experienced it
You want to sing, it's fresh like spring
You want to pass it on

I wish for you my friend, this happiness that I've found
You can depend on Him it matters not where you're bound

I'll shout it from the mountain tops, I want the world to know
the King of Life, has come to me
I want to pass it on.


Experience any sparks lately?




walk slow. xoxo.

52 comments:

Mom said...

After such a hard 2 weeks, I am glad that you have had the chance to visit a place you love. It is so neat to see the doctors giving care to the children and see their faces.

Anonymous said...

what city are you in? maybe i can help when i get a break from school? i don't speak chin.ese. but i'm great at charades! -tiffany

marriage beuro in jaipur said...

this is fantastic post

Anonymous said...

buy xanax online cod xanax withdrawal fever - xanax online cheap no prescription

Anonymous said...

buy ambien what do generic ambien look like - ambien side effects heart palpitations

Anonymous said...

xanax sale xanax dosage with pictures - yellow xanax bars r039 time release

Anonymous said...

zolpidem 10 mg how long do zolpidem side effects last - zolpidem generic pill

Anonymous said...

buy diazepam diazepam buy online no prescription - can get high diazepam

Anonymous said...

valium generic where can i buy valium online uk - valium general anxiety

Anonymous said...

cheap diazepam online diazepam without prescriptions usa - what does valium do recreationally

Anonymous said...

overdose on zolpidem zolpidem tartrate side effects pregnancy - zolpidem contraindications

Anonymous said...

xanax anxiety buy xanax online overnight delivery - xanax drug manufacturer

Anonymous said...

diazepam dosage for dogs diazepam schedule v drug - buy diazepam online australia

Anonymous said...

order ativan online purchase ativan online no prescription - half life ativan vs xanax

Anonymous said...

lorazepam vs diazepam buy diazepam usa no prescription - buy diazepam online usa

Anonymous said...

diazepam 5mg diazepam 10 mg ldt - diazepam dosage effects

Anonymous said...

soma cost 350mg carisoprodol generic soma - buy soma online no prescription overnight

Anonymous said...

buy soma soma drug news - soma controlled medication

Anonymous said...

soma medication side effects of the medication soma - carisoprodol 700

Anonymous said...

carisoprodol without prescription carisoprodol for back pain - long will soma show drug test

Anonymous said...

l9g0aod7 http://www.isotretinoin4health.net/#cheapest-accutane - order isotretinoin purchase accutane

Anonymous said...

purchase soma buy cheap soma online no prescription - carisoprodol mechanism of action

Anonymous said...

order ambien online safe dosage ambien cr - ambien dose insomnia

Anonymous said...

buy valium online side effects for valium 5mg - buy valium online with paypal

Anonymous said...

order valium generic valium identification - valium and xanax interactions

Anonymous said...

xn7bl2d5 http://www.cheapisotretinoinforless.net/#accutane-no-prescription - buy isotretinoin online no prescription buying accutane online

Anonymous said...

xn7bl2d5 http://www.cheapisotretinoinforless.net/#buying-accutane-online - isotretinoin online isotretinoin online pharmacy

Anonymous said...

r0n6ks8f http://www.fatfreemind.com/#phentermine-online-no-prescription - phentermine online no prescription phentermine online pharmacy

Anonymous said...

not9js6f http://www.thepromise1073.com/#propecia-pills - propecia pills propecia price

Anonymous said...

not9js6f http://www.thepromise1073.com/#buy-cheap-propecia - buy cheap propecia buy finasteride

Anonymous said...

dsc4hd7h http://www.jonathanornstein.com/#escitalopram-without-prescription - escitalopram without prescription generic escitalopram

Anonymous said...

It works by boosting the activity of neurotransmitters which regulate feelings of anxiety, hunger and pleasure. Meridia does not actually cause weight loss or stimulate metabolism; rather, it helps people eat sensibly and control cravings. http://www.sibutramineforsale.com/ - sibutramine without prescription Users could take it for up to two years, but most did not do so because they were able to incorporate exercise and healthy eating into their lifestyles. Meridia is a medicine that helps people lose weight when taken along with a sensible diet and exercise program.

Anonymous said...

Another reason to take Cymbalta is if you would like to control the symptoms of fibromylagia you may be having. [url=http://www.edensedgeband.com/]buy cheap cymbalta[/url] This syndrome is somewhat puzzling to doctors as there is no agreement as to what causes it although many believe that fibromylagia is brought on by stress or low grade depression. Cymbalta without prescription When you have fibromyalgia you experience chronic pain in your muscles, feel fatigued and have sleep problems.

Anonymous said...

This potent and well respected medication is often thought to be preferential, when compared to medications like it, because it has a very low toxicity, a short half life, and it also begins to work quite quickly. Klonopin is effective but may be accompanied by some unintended side effects. http://www.klonopin4sale.com/ - order klonopin online Additionally, mania is often treated with Klopin until other drugs can start working. Additionally, these effects can continue for six months after taking the medication.

Anonymous said...

Discount Cymbalta online pharmacy. http://www.bracschool.org/ - cheapest cymbalta The side effects associated with this medication include mood/behavior changes, restlessness, feeling impulsive, becoming more depressed or having thoughts about suicide or hurting oneself. Patients taking Cymbalta should not take this medication with Mellaril or an MAO inhibitor such as Furoxone, Marplan, Nardil or Azilect as doing so could result in a dangerous drug interaction which could lead to some serious health issues. Cymbalta is a liquid prescription medication that is used to treat major depressive disorder and general anxiety disorder.

Anonymous said...

Xanax - Get Rid Of Your Anxiety [url=http://tinypolitics.com/]order alprazolam[/url] Patents should not stop taking Xanax suddenly as they will need to , taper the dosage gradually. Some of the more common complaints include but are not limited to hives, fatigued, loss of coordination, rashes, suicidal ideation, hallucinations, ataxia, short term memory loss, and more.

Anonymous said...

When taken Ambien should help the user fall asleep. http://www.mrblowup.com/ - order zolpidem Retailers when purchasing Ambien, preferably retail stores and not the Internet. 25mg for controlled release or 10mg with doctors orders).

Anonymous said...

t6m2m6k7 http://www.tanzonespa.com/#order-propecia - order propecia order propecia online

Anonymous said...

l3m7n8s63h http://www.klonopindiscountsale.net/#cheap-klonopin - cheap klonopin klonopin without prescriptions

Anonymous said...

l3m7n8s63h http://www.cheapativansales.net/#buy-ativan-no-prescription - buy ativan no prescription buy ativan online

Anonymous said...

l8d92h4b http://www.zithromax365.com/#purchase-azithromycin - purchase azithromycin purchase azithromycin online

Anonymous said...

Hello, http://www.freearticlebin.com/#buy-prozac buy prozac http://www.meridiaasasolution.com/#buy-meridia meridia medication

Anonymous said...

Friends, http://www.ambien365.com/ambien.html ambien without prescription http://www.happypharmsales.net/female-viagra.html female viagra online no prescription

Anonymous said...

Friends, http://www.neurontinmedicine.com/#neurontin-online-pharmacy cheap neurontin http://www.prednisoneforless.com/#prednisone-medication buy cheap prednisone

Anonymous said...

Hello, http://www.healthcaremedsnorx.net/viagra.html buy viagra http://www.antidepressantsnorx.com/remeron.html generic remeron for sale

Anonymous said...

BaskAwake neurontin price - neurontin sale http://www.neurontingenericprice.net/#neurontin-sale

Anonymous said...

Committing Suicide By Drug Overdose celexa antidepressant - cheap celexa no prescription http://www.bestpricecelexaon.net/#cheap-celexa-no-prescription

Anonymous said...

BaskAwake order neurontin - order neurontin online http://www.neurontingenericprice.net/#order-neurontin-online

Anonymous said...

Blood Pressure Medicine Ramipril prednisone for sale - prednisone medication http://www.prednisone4sale.com/#prednisone-medication

Anonymous said...

Dog Pain Pills diflucan for sale no prescription - price of diflucan http://www.diflucansaleonline.net/#price-of-diflucan , [url=http://www.diflucansaleonline.net/#diflucan-fluconazole-150mg ]diflucan fluconazole 150mg [/url]

Anonymous said...

Quality Use Of Medicines Program buy lexapro online no prescription - cheap escitalopram http://www.costoflexaproonline.net/#cheap-escitalopram , [url=http://www.costoflexaproonline.net/#cheap-lexapro ]cheap lexapro [/url]

Anonymous said...

tfv zithromax chlamydia - zithromax online http://www.zithromaxonlinerx.net/#zithromax-sale, [url=http://www.zithromaxonlinerx.net/#zithromax-sale]order azithromycin no prescription [/url]