I don't really believe anything is, "over sharing."
If you spend more than 10 minutes with me on a given day, you know the status of my bladder, my feelings about my students, work, school issues, what I ate all day, how I'm feeling, and what I think about what you are wearing. I don't hesitate to put personal things on my blog because I have the, "everybody poops," perspective that we are humans having a human experience. We can relate to each others short comings, joys, mishaps, and adventures. If we can't laugh with/at each other, what do we have?
Except when it comes to my relationship. This junk is private.
If you haven't guessed, I am back with the boy that was the dramatic focal point of my heart-break post in October. It's true, he broke my heart by returning to Chi.na and then choosing not to jump back into a relationship with me after I had broken up with him (twice) previously.
Our story is so complicated. So interesting. So personal. The only people who know the whole extent of it are us. And it's good that way. But in the spirit of sharing life, I want to catch my blog up to date on my relationship status. I've asked him how much he is comfortable being discussed on the blog and he answer is, "not a lot." Homeboy is a private soul, and thus teaches me to be more discretionary as well. But he also said that our story deserves some air time. Even if only to encourage others that perseverance and faith can reap great rewards.
We think we are a miracle. And we routinely congratulate ourselves for working for our relationship and not giving up.
We met in the wee hours of Valentine's Day 2012 on a dance floor. He called me the next day and asked me to dinner. We were both smitten and intrigued. We dated. I freaked out and broke up with him. He took me back. I freaked out again and broke up with him again. He returned to Ethiopia. I investigated my heart and my ideas of cultural faith. We missed each other. He started calling me. I found out about our age difference. I forgave him for hiding it from me. I asked him not to see other people. He returned to China for me. He freaked out on me because of our age difference and left me a week after returning to China. I hunted him down and begged him back. He said yes because he loves me. And I love him. We recently celebrated our 13 month anniversary.
See...a miracle! We are inter-racial, inter-cultural, inter-religious (Greek Orthodox/Protestant Christian), and have a large age gap. (I'm older.) Yet somehow it completely makes sense. It's like this is how my relationship was meant to be.
I have found the person who loves me unconditionally. I want to be the person that he sees when he looks at me. We make each other better. It turns out the fluffy Hallmark card crap is true...being a pair rather than a solo rider can be amazing. I had no idea! ha.
He loves that I have lived several years of adult life alone and that I know exactly who I am and what I want. He loves that I have opinions and ideas and big dreams. He keeps me from being destructive and provides insight when I am being dramatic. He laughs with me, believes in me, and loves me more than I think I deserve. I love that he is a listener, a thinker, a peace-maker, and a leader. He provides my life with adventure, exploration of a new culture, and discovery. We both think we are the lucky one. What a dream.
We both agree that we'd rather have an unknown future and be together than be apart because of "rational" reasons and be miserable. I don't want to live safe. I want to be with the person who makes me ridiculously happy and then answer the big questions when we get there. There will always be big questions in life. And through this experience I have learned to let go, allow the unknowns of life to remain unknowns, and take risks, especially in the name of love.
So that's the basic story of my, "little relationship that could".
Blog update - complete.
(And aren't our babies going to be the CUTEST THINGS YOU'VE EVER SEEN????!!!) Wait - I get ahead of myself sometimes. haha. JK.
And that's the story of how I became a, "we."
walk slow. xoxo.